It's Okay to be Wrong

[Ariel]

Use this thread to discuss the following blog post:

It's Okay to be Wrong

[Joanna]

Ariel,
funny, I've been thinking recently about my blog posts and that some of them are somehow...obsolete I wouldn't write the things I wrote then now. And I did think about this in terms of right/wrong. You made me think about levels and that maybe, for some people, what I wrote then is useful now. And I'm relieved.
Also, my sense of worth is/was derieved from knowledge, so admitting to being wrong or encountering situations in which two contradicting things are equally valid is very difficult. But it's possible to get through it.
thanks for this video.
Love
Joanna

[lovingawareness]

One of the thoughts that has influenced me is "whatever my beliefs and perceptions are now, they will evolve to the point that later I will think they are wrong, or at least highly limited".

So far, this has been proven true in my life, even for more timeless teachings like from the Buddha or Krishnamurthi. When I read them 20 years ago, I created my own perceptions of those teachings, which I've mostly let go of over time. They weren't wrong in any absolute sense, but they were certainly intertwined with my own identity, need for security and defenses, and so on. My idea of "non-duality" has changed as well. That thought has helped me over the years.

[deeprivernz]

so admitting to being wrong or encountering situations in which two contradicting things are equally valid is very difficult

Whenever one person says "This is the Truth" there will always be some other person who will say the complete opposite and both will believe that they are 'right' and the other is 'wrong'. Thus both sides of the argument are 'right' and both are also 'wrong' - just depends on one's perspective and beliefs. Thus I no longer see my beliefs as being right or wrong, they are just what they are in that moment - subject to change at any time. (This drives my partner nuts at times!) Thus I step forward on my journey, letting one belief go and adopting another, even though I know I will also probably have to let it go sometime, too.
A BIG step on my journey was when I realised that two opposites can be seen as either 'contradictory' or 'paradoxical'. If they contradict each other then no resolution can be found - lose/lose situation. If, however, they are paradoxical then resolution can be found - win/win situation.
I have found that it is ALWAYS possible to find the paradox if I am open to it (even black v white!), but I have to be prepared to change and perhaps let go of some belief that I may have had all my life. If I use the example of a see-saw with two opposites on the ends, paradox will be found at the balance point in the middle. I tease myself, and others, by asking what will be in the middle if I put 'balance' on one end and 'unbalance' on the other? And, yes, I do have an answer!
In that I only have one belief system and that is to let go of all belief systems, I now must let go of my belief about finding a paradox in the middle of the see-saw!

[scarface]

This post made me remind a quote from the book of Dale carnegie. Here it is:

When Theodore Roosevelt was in the White House, he confessed that if he could be right 75 percent of the time, he would reach the highest measure of his expectation.
If that was the highest rating that one of the most distinguished men of the twentieth century could hope to obtain, what about you and me?

If you can be sure of being right only 55 percent of the time, you can go down to Wall Street and make a million dollars a day. If you can't be sure of being right even 55 percent of the time, why should you
tell other people they are wrong?

My persons experience is that I'm more often wrong the accurate. And on the things I know a lot about, "my circle of confidence", I think if I would say in those fields I'm right 75% it's probably a high estimation.

Fun thing is though that 90% of the people think they are right 90% of the time. Let's face it, that if that was true we people wouldn't disagree so much.

[Lee]

Note: I’ve set it to play in HD quality by default, so for those of you who are on a low-bandwidth connection, when you hit the play button, fiddle with the HD button and make sure it’s black (off) so that you download the faster and lower quality version. (If you could let me know in the comments what you did to play the low quality version, that’d be awesome. You may need to turn it on and off. Thank you.)

For those of you who prefer reading, let’s summarize what was covered in the video here.

You are so considerate, Ariel. I’ve seen this throughout. Very Refreshing!
The video played the same, though. I fiddled with the HD and it didn’t change anything but responded well. (a joke for the older crowd)

I did push a button and got a full screen view- cool!

Being able to read the summary was great. It really doesn’t matter what you say, I’m for it.

And I enjoy looking at you- hands on head, hands behind head, and all the wonderful gestures one can see in slo mo. But I’m only watching for a few minutes, so don’t get self conscious. (Is that the same red shirt? lol)

When it first started this time, the photo of you- big one- was on the white door- without a frame. It then faded.

Agree with your message. “Being wrong” is interpreted as “I am wrong. There’s something wrong with Me, and I can’t accept that.” Thus the defense. Maybe if we said, “I was wrong about that” it would be easer for the ego to swallow.

There is another perspective where one is often right, and they want to be wrong. Because they don’t want what they are right about. How does one deal with the burden of being right, when they want to be wrong?

[Roger Gietzen]

Ariel,
I can relate with the experience of reviewing past writings and thinking... did I really say that. After reflecting on that example of "being wrong", I decided not only is it okay to be wrong... its great to be wrong. At least in that context the only way I can look back in disbelief is if I've grown a lot over that time. So cheers to being wrong more often!!