The Will to Live

Birth and death are two sides of the same coin called Eternal Life. The Life that you are (notice that I did NOT say have) has no opposite. There is no extinguishment of Life. Only the transformation of what arises within it.

One of the egoic mind’s biggest fears is death. Fear of death.

It’s been shown countless times on TV and in movies… someone puts a gun to someone’s head and suddenly they begin begging for their life, willing to do almost anything as long as they’re allowed to live. “Please don’t kill me!”

I find myself being able to relate to this mentality less and less lately. What I’m finding is that I feel like I’m losing my familiar almost instinctual will to live.

Now the dualistic mind may hear this and think, “You don’t want to live? Well then that must mean you want to die! Oh no! What’s wrong!? There must be something wrong!” Right?

But that’s not what I mean in this case. See, it’s more about no longer desperately clinging to one over the other, coming to peace with both, and valuing all of life including life in the physical and the nonphysical, finding that ultimately who you are literally CAN NOT die and that there’s nothing so terrible about the transformation we call death anyways. So… what’s the problem?

(As usual, this is nothing I can or even have any desire to prove. It’s simply something I know, and I have no idea how I know. I just do, and here I am sharing this knowing. There seems to be something deeper to whatever it is that we are that goes beyond guessing and theorizing and just knows.)

Life Beyond Birth and Death

As a separate self with a body/mind/spirit, we tend to identify with objects and ideas, thoughts and emotions. In a way, we experience ourselves almost like we were the clouds in the sky that come and go and change forms in the process.

Yet our true nature is much more like the sky: infinite, vast, eternal, untouchable, and perhaps most notably, empty.

The sky is totally unaffected by even the stormiest of clouds. Does the sky run and hide every time a hurricane blows through? Does the sky mourn the death of a cloud? Does the sky celebrate the birth of a cloud? Well, no. Not at all. There’s really no reaction to the happenings of the clouds, good or bad. The sky is just empty, being. The sky may certainly be aware of the clouds passing through, yet neither clings to nor resists anything the clouds do or don’t do.

This may sound very unemotional and almost heartless, and I suppose in a way it is. What we call emotions are yet more clouds that come and go within the emptiness of the sky/what we are. Instead of emotional, a more accurate pointer to the sky would be allowing and accepting. The sky allows the clouds to be whatever they so choose to be, without judgment, no matter what, for it knows full well that it is unconditionally safe and well.

Similarly, I’m finding that our true nature is not passively disconnected either, as if just being meant that you just don’t care. There’s an almost tangible quality of Love here as well, a Love that I write with a capital L. It’s not the human love we hear about in movies and romance novels where we want to constantly be around the other or somehow feel incomplete without them. Rather, it’s a more unconditional Divine Love based in allowance and appreciation. It’s the type of Love that has no opposite for it arises from the non-dualistic Source that has no opposite. (This statement is a little off given that Love doesn’t actually arise since that it IS everywhere and it IS everything, including a supposed source out of which it would arise, but the perceptual human experience of it may be likened to that of a flow that arises from within, swirls around our consciousness, and is finally expressed without.)

Being Okay With Everything

Anyways, coming back to the idea of the will to live, there is a shift that seems to happen between having a deep investment in one’s personal safety and security and the continuation of the “me,” to a resting in the well-being of Isness, regardless of what happens on the surface.

It’s like we begin taking the world less seriously, no longer really buying into the idea that our safety can literally be found in this world, in emotions, in achievements, in money, or in worldly things in the first place. It’s similar to how you can be totally absorbed in a movie, caught up in the drama, and then later step back and say, “Oh right, it’s just a movie. No biggie.”

To those still caught in the drama of the movie (or dream if you wanna use that word), it may seem uncaring if you no longer take the world’s problems as seriously as you once did, but you from your expanded perspective you can see that even their reactions to your stepping back are just more appearances arising within the dream movie. Heck, even your own reactions are just more of the dream so even they aren’t all that big of a deal either!

Life is okay. Death is okay. Birth is okay. Everything is okay. All is well.

As words this may sound hollow, idealistic, or perhaps even a naïve delusion, especially when life seems horrible. Of course.

Yet when the emptiness within reawakens, there is an untouchableness that arises, for one recognizes that who they truly are can not be touched by anything in this world.

That said, pain is still experienced just as sharply. If you get whacked in the head it’ll still hurt and you may still bleed, just as before. If your body jumps out of a building, gravity still makes it go splat. Of course. Earth’s rules still apply to the earthly part of the infinite you. Yes.

Yet as we fall back into our true nature, clutching onto nothing as we fall and fall and fall, resting nowhere and aware of it all, it seems like there’s a deep okayness with it all, somehow, that doesn’t need to be forced or believed in. This okayness with all of life just naturally arises. With this sense of well-being, there may be a loss, to a greater or lesser extent depending on how life unfolds in this particular case, of the intense egoic will to live.

With this transformation, when it’s time to live as a physicalized being, we do so, peacefully and openly. No attachment or aversion to life or death. When it’s time for awareness to consciously transition back into the non-physical with the experience we call death, that too is accepted peacefully and openly. No attachment or aversion to life or death. There’s no fear, for there is no real death, and “on the other side,” what could there possibly be other than more of this infinite One that you truly are? More experiences for the youless you.

If you’re gonna live, live. If you’re gonna die, die. No worries. No resistance. Hakuna matata.

Defending Your Life

So if we find ourselves totally okay with life and death, what about the question, “Should I defend my own life should someone try to take it?”

I really like the responses to Neale’s inquiries given in the books Conversations with God.

In the dialogs, God actually gave two different answers, depending upon the context of the being whose life is being threatened.

The first answer was directed towards your everyday regular asleep person living on the earth. The response was that if someone is abusing you, you should stop the abuse. Not only is it a reflection of loving yourself, but it also demonstrates your love for the other, for when one is allowed to abuse another, the abuser too is experiencing abuse.

The second answer was given from the perspective of a highly evolved being, or an HEB as it was referred to in the book. The perspective of the HEB would be along the lines of, “If you feel so strongly that you need to take my life for your own evolution, please do so. I love you that much to lay down my life and give you the gift of this experience. I know that I am an eternal being and recognize that I will be okay no matter what decisions are made. Not only this, I understand that I too played a role in the co-creation of this experience and as such, there’s no need for me to invalidate this creation. From here, there is simply a recognition of what I created and a new choice that is consciously made as a reflection of who I now choose to be.”

So, would you defend your life if someone wanted to take it? Well, that totally depends on a whole number of things, including but not limited to such things as your own level of consciousness, who you’re dealing with, the context of the situation, who else is involved, and so on. It doesn’t seem to be very black and white.

Defending the Lives of Others

I was talking about this with my mom earlier today she asked both about defending your own life as well as defending the lives of those you love. For example, she said that she would do more to prevent the death of her children than to prevent her own death.

What do you think? I’d love to hear your perspective on this, especially those of you who are parents. I have no kids of my own and don’t feel that biological pull to start a family at this point in my life, so I’m sure many of you could relate to this better than I could.

If someone were to try and take the lives of your children or loved ones, would you intervene?

Would you kill the attacker if need be or would it be preferable to simply disable or injure them, sparing their life?