So some teachers would suggest that you should get rid of all your desires altogether for that is the ideal state, to be happy with what is and to desire nothing more than what is here and now. Then you’ve got other teachers who would suggest that it’s not really about the desires themselves, but rather the attachment to (and therefore resistance to) the desires themselves. When we get into the discussion about desire, it can be helpful to get clear about our definition of the word desire.
Isha Judd has a hilarious video where she addresses the difference between renouncing the objects of your desire in the name of enlightenment versus letting go of the attachment to desires, as well as the difference between clingy attachment which many people confuse with love and what love actually is.
There’s also a passage I’d like to share with you that’s just past the 6 minute mark in the following Abraham-Hicks video. The passage has to do with the idea of “releasing desires.”
In the moment you stop pushing against [your monsters and fears], you catch a current that takes you to where you wanna go. That’s why some say “let go let God” or “relax.” “Release desire” is what many teach and we know that’s their way of tricking you into not having any more resistance because it is not possible for you to release desires. You are here FULL of desire, but sometimes by releasing desire, or feeling like you are, you release resistance and when you release resistance, your cork floats back to the surface or you catch the current of your stream, you see.”
Allowing, surrender, non-resistance, being, going with the flow, saying yes to what is… call it what you will but it’s pretty fundamental stuff.
It’s pretty wild to see yourself making every ego mistake in the book… like what in the world!? I thought I got this already!
This seems to be part of the journey from “knowing” something (as in “yeah yeah, I know I know, I’ve read that and heard people say it a million times so I know what’s up”) to “OHHH, now I KNOW that in my own direct experience throughout the totality of my being. Now there’s no longer even a question that this works and that doesn’t.”
Learning from others is an incredibly valuable experience. Anyone who’s ever read a good book or had a great teacher knows this. Yet the thing is that we can’t ride the wave of someone else’s realization and expect it to be entirely sufficient for ourselves. Life just don’t work that way! We can’t skip around our own growth by simply internalizing the concepts. As the saying goes, you can’t just talk the talk, you gotta walk the walk.
One of the great things about this human experience is that it provides us with such incredible opportunities to EXPERIENCE all this stuff so that we finally GET IT for ourselves.
“Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.”
Let me share a video clip with you. It’s from the movie Leap of Faith, a comedy with actor Steve Martin (Jonas, in the movie) who plays a fake faith healer who goes from town to town preaching about Jesus and giving people “healings” (stuff like giving older people who walk in with difficulty a wheelchair and then having them miraculously stand up and walk on stage, haha). Anyways, in this scene the local sheriff is trying to call him out in front of a crowd by bringing up the preacher’s tainted past. The way Jonas responds to the accusations (about 2:30 in the video) is pretty awesome.
Ultimately this is about accepting yourself FULLY as you are and no longer running from what is.
HERE I AM.
You don’t “get there” by getting to a “there” that’s somewhere other than “here.” The ironic thing is that when you fully accept the darkness within you here and now, it ceases to hold its power over you, or more accurately you cease giving your power away to it and recognize that it is actually completely powerless and always was.
It seems that what we call “saintliness” is more about loving what is and from that love arises the behavior of a saint. It’s not about running away from your darkness, but being at peace with it and bringing the light of awareness to it which is itself incredibly healing and transformative.
Being. It’s one of those spiritual words that’s tossed around like presence, meditation, nirvana, and so on. Not exactly one of the words that’s commonly used in day-to-day life, but is still vitally important in the whole spiritual game that can be played.
So, being. What is it anyways?
Let’s start this post off with Adyashanti going up to bat first. Batter up!
(Can’t embed this video, so you gotta clicka the linka.)
He describes being as the You you’ve always been. The You that you really really are, regardless of how old you are, if you’re enlightened or not, if even you’re doing the whole spiritual shebang or not.
One critical thing he points out is that “being” is “form without a particular attribute.”
This is so key.
Being vs. A Being
Typically when we think of being, we think of a being. For example, a person is a type of being. Cats are beings. Dogs are beings. There are lots of living beings and maybe even some non-physical beings running around this place like ghosts or guardian angels and whatnot.
So the word “being” is thought of as a pointer to a particular creature of some sort. An individual.
But this is not what the word “being” is pointing to when we talk about what you really are. It’s not about this being or that being. In fact, it’s not about any particular being at all!
It’s just about being. Not individualized or part of any particular living thing.
It’s not so much a thing, like a human being, but more a presence. It’s existence. It’s just here, whatever the heck it is. It’s just here.
Look to your own experience. This is easily confirmed and verified if you look within and see for yourself instead of trying to wrap your mind around some words and theory.
Being is here within.
Does it have any attributes that make it human? Do you own a human being as opposed to a cat being? Where does being end? Does it have any boundaries that you can locate? Does it have an age? Does it have a size? A color? A shape?
The living beingness that is here is formless. It is nameless. It’s just a presence that is here. and it’s always here.
It’s so obviously here that it’s totally overlooked as we make our way through life.
Connecting With Another
It is what is seen when you gaze into the eyes of any other living being. Again, being not as in an object with any particular attributes, history, personality, or any of that superficial stuff… but just living beingness. Aliveness. It is Life itself peering through the eyes of another.
Looking into the eyes of another, when you do this without labeling, categorizing, or in any way adding additional mental processing, you’re seeing Life itself. It is Life connecting with Life. Awareness seeing Awareness. Being being with Being.
No identity is necessary. No person. No man. No woman. No story superimposed upon what arises. None of that. Just Being.
There is no separation when Being connects with Being.
There’s no “me” in the way of being. There is nothing to cloud the unification.
Scott Kiloby (click to check out his beautiful new site!) just published a pair of videos on the topic of reification, a fancy word pointing to how the mind separates things.
In these videos he shares a wonderful discussion on such topics as why enlightenment isn’t something to get, how it’s not something the mind can ever get, the importance of resting as nonconceptual awareness, and how thought is not your enemy.
Will we be free to laugh, to not close down and hold back when our heart desires to open up, to be ourselves, to really loooooove one another, to delight in being de light that we are, and to really enjoy life without all the fears and worries that once weighed us down and held us back?
Do we HAVE to live this way? Of course not. Yet this seems to be a vibrant part of this great transformation we’re seeing in human society today as people connect to who they really are.
People are lightening up. Here’s a few examples of this happening:
How would you naturally express yourself today if you had no fear of anything? What have you always wanted to do? What excites you? Your answer may change tomorrow, or even in the next second. What arises for you now, if you allow yourself to freely be yourself?
I have attempted meditation in the past, but for one reason or another was inconsistent in my practice. Recently, I have begun my attempts again with meditation, and the spiritual enlightenment process- but this time I am very serious about it. I am ready to embark on my spiritual journey, and I am in it for the long haul. Strangely enough though, the past week or so I have become even more stressed, which seems to be counter intuitive to what this whole process is about. When I try to meditate I just become frustrated, and when I think about it I feel stressed and fearful. I know that it is directly due to my ego, and the insecurity that initially comes with one stepping outside of their comfort zone. I read your entry about forgetting all truths, and I think that that is one of my biggest problems. I read about “all of this stuff” and subconsciously develop these unrealistic expectations. I am just having so much trouble letting my mind go blank, is it like this for everyone in the beginning? If you could give me some insight, and maybe some advice/tips I would appreciate it so much. I randomly came across your website, but I am very grateful I did. You have really helped me with all of your posts.
Hey there J. Awesome questions. What you’re asking about are some super common things that arise so don’t worry, nothing’s gone wrong. You’re on the right track.
Frustration and Stress in Meditation
I am ready to embark on my spiritual journey, and I am in it for the long haul. Strangely enough though, the past week or so I have become even more stressed, which seems to be counter intuitive to what this whole process is about. When I try to meditate I just become frustrated, and when I think about it I feel stressed and fearful. I know that it is directly due to my ego, and the insecurity that initially comes with one stepping outside of their comfort zone.
Yeah, we would hope that when we go into meditation, we’d immediately go into a state of incredible peace and bliss. It turns out though, that there’s a little bit more of a process to it than that, which is exactly what you’re seeing.
It’s very common to begin experiencing emotional roller coasters as you begin meditating. Basically what happens is that when you start looking at that stuff inside that you’ve been avoiding in the past for whatever reason, it comes right up. It’s like the ego knows your buttons and exactly how to push ‘em to get you to quit seeing it for what it is.
As you said, it’s part of stepping outside of your comfort zone. If you can just allow yourself to feel whatever feelings arise in the moment, that’s all that’s necessary. The practice of meditation becomes nothing more than an openness and allowance to experience anything that arises without identification with it.
The more you can surrender to it, the more quickly it will pass.
I read about “all of this stuff” and subconsciously develop these unrealistic expectations.
Yeah, even the expectations are products of the mind, ideas that suggest that you should be experiencing something other than what you’re experiencing now. The future should be somehow better or different than what is now. This is just what minds do.
Minds can do amazing things, like even taking spiritual teachings and turning them into more mental gymnastics. Lots of things arise, like these subconscious expectations, that can be consciously let go of once they are recognized for what they are: just more mind stuff.
We continue to go deeper and deeper, layer by layer.
Most of us have qualities about ourselves that society would judge as less than “ideal”… whatever that is. Maybe we’re not really really ridiculously good looking, maybe we’re overweight, maybe we’re gay, maybe we’ve got ADD, maybe we’re not the smartest cookie in the batch… whatever. Everyone’s got something..
The thing is though, in this lifetime, you’re not meant to be anything other than who and what you really are. You’re here to BE YOURSELF, the unique expression of the infinite you.
You don’t have to box yourself in to some arbitrary idealized standard in order to be lovable, acceptable, and worthy. Nope!
You Are Truly Loved features content designed to guide people towards enlightenment, unconditional love, and living a life of joy through Self-realization and proper application of the Law of Attraction.