When people talk about growing up, taking on life’s challenges, and becoming a “bigger person,” this metaphor of being a “bigger person” has a lot of truth to it.
The phrase stems from the recognition that you have expanded. You can handle bigger problems, more energy, more love, more people, more money, more abundance, more lightness, more darkness, more LIFE.
The size of the problems you can handle in life is directly related to the size of YOU.
Spiritual and personal growth is all about validating and accepting every portion of yourself. Expansion is ultimately the process of inclusion, not exclusion.
Being Aware of Darkness, But Choosing Light
The farther you go into the light, the more aware of the darkness you’re able to become. This doesn’t mean you have to then choose darkness, but you become more aware of the choices you have on both sides and you look at them simply as choices because that’s all they are. You have the power of awareness.
Remember, this physical reality is all about choices. Just because you may become more aware of evil, “negative choices,” or “dark choices” doesn’t mean you have to actually go and experience them. In fact, the more willing you are to become more aware of them without resistance or judgment, the less you need to experience them because you are allowing them to become equally valid to any choice you could make. When they become equally valid to any choice you could make, you are then effortlessly capable of choosing what you prefer without invalidating what you don’t prefer. The inner struggle drops away. Such is the power of acceptance and self-acceptance. This is the true freedom of non-judgment. This is the essence of allowing.
It becomes a recognition that that’s simply not where you live anymore. You live in this new house now, not that old house. It doesn’t mean that your old house is a bad house. It served you well. It brought you to the place where you can now choose this house. So bless it, love it, keep it, own it, but leave it in its place. It’s a place you no longer live, but someone else may still be using that neighborhood and bless them for experiencing those things you have experienced, knowing that they are also going up the ladder in their own way, in their own time. Make it all equal and you will have equal ability to choose anything you wish. Anything at all.
This world is one of paradox. It is a world in which two dualistic and seemingly opposing viewpoints often battle it out for the title of being RIGHT. (Insert heroic trumpet fanfare here!)
In fact, being right is the one thing that people(‘s egos) will sacrifice most anything for, including their own happiness, health, wealth, and even their very lives. Never underestimate the human ego’s desire to be right!!
The irony is that from a higher perspective, from the level of non-dualistic consciousness, it becomes clear that NEITHER are right AND BOTH are right! Say what!? How can this be??
It’s not this OR that, but this AND that.
Perhaps you’ve seen two people who are arguing about something, only to realize that they’re both right. The thing is that they’re both looking at the same thing, but simply seeing it from different perspectives.
When you can stand in the center and realize how both seemingly opposing viewpoints are actually both valid, are really the same truth viewed from different perspectives, then you can say you are centered in your being.
The most natural way to get to that integrated space is to let the mind be quiet. Paradox can be conceptualized in the mind, but there’s truly nothing to understand. Simply be still and know. The paradoxes will be revealed to you.
It seems that reality is centered right between the paradoxes. Life finally “clicks” when you sit between the paradoxes.
Surrender. It is easily one of the most important aspects of spirituality. It is synonymous with letting go and allowing. The hallmark of surrender is the giving up of resistance. It’s a being transparent to energy that is passing through you.
If surrender is so important, what is it, really?
Let’s look at a variety of definitions from a number of spiritual teachers to make sure we’re very clear on what surrender is all about.
The traditional sense of surrender includes a sense of loss and defeat, a place of weakness and inability, a choice to end the experience and exit the journey. In a spiritual context, surrender means something very different. It’s something applied while fully engaged with the experience rather than an end to it.
Surrender
sur⋅ren⋅der -- verb -- to yield (something) to the possession or power of another; deliver up possession of on demand or under duress
-Dictionary.com
Let’s examine some spiritual perspectives of surrender. True surrender is not just an action, but a way of being in the world.
“What is the secret of your serenity?” asked a student.
“Wholehearted cooperation with the inevitable.” said the Master.
-Anthony DeMello
Our buddy Deepak would like to chime in here.
With surrender, passion is directed toward life itself--in spiritual terms, passion is the same as letting yourself be swept away on the river of life, which is eternal and neverending in its flow. The final fruit of surrender is ecstasy: when you can let go of all selfish attachments, when you trust that love really is at the core of your nature, you feel complete peace. In this peace there is a seed of sweetness perceived in the very center of the heart, and from this seed, with patience and devotion, you nurture the supreme state of joy known as ecstasy. This, then, is the path to love, although it isn’t the only path.
-Deepak Chopra
Our good friend Eckhart Tolle is here as well.
Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have. Make the Now the primary focus of your life. Whereas before you dwelt in time and paid brief visits to the Now, have your dwelling place in the Now and pay brief visits to past and future when required to deal with the practical aspects of your life situation. Always say “yes” to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to something that already is? What could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you.
-Eckhart Tolle
David Hawkins has some words to say too.
The pathway to Enlightenment via radical truth is demanding and requires the surrendering of all belief systems. Only then does the Ultimate Reality reveal itself as the sought-after ‘I’ of the Supreme.
To let go of the known for the unknown requires great commitment, willingness, and devotion to surrendering one’s faith to God.
The experience of the presence of God is available and within at all times, but awaits choice. That choice is made only by surrendering everything other than peace and love to God. In return, the divinity of the Self reveals Itself as ever present but not experienced because it has been ignored or forgotten, or one has chosen otherwise.
The spiritual aspirant, therefore, is wise to detach from all positionalities and opinions and be willing to surrender the ego’s temporary satisfactions for a higher goal.
-David Hawkins
Ramana Maharshi puts it like this:
There are two ways of achieving surrender. One is looking into the source of the ‘I’ and merging into that source. The other is feeling ‘I am helpless myself, God alone is all powerful, and except by throwing myself completely on Him, there is no other means of safety for me’, and thus gradually developing the conviction that God alone exists and the ego does not count. Both methods lead to the same goal. Complete surrender is another name for jnana or liberation.
-Ramana Maharshi
Bashar just came up and asked for the mic.
Knowingness comes from surrender, letting go. Now, we understand that many of you, according to the definitions you have, many of you will label this as a loss of some sort of a lack of control of some sort and this is not the case.
Surrender, if we may provide our definition, is the letting go of the concept of who you think you’re supposed to be and actually being who you are, because who you are is unlimited possibilities, and when you allow yourself to surrender to the idea and the experience that you were created in the image of the Infinite, which means that you are Infinite possibilities too, then the physical reality, which is only a mirror, can then reflect those unlimited possibilities back to you in the synchronicities as they naturally unfold in your physical day-to-day life.
So surrender is actually acceptance of your total self, not the forsaking of your total self, as many of you have been led to believe through the definitions that your world has provided you with that only serve to limit you, and this is what we want to share with you and what we suggest you learn to give up, are those limitations.
-Bashar
As Adyashanti would put it, surrender or suffer.
Surrender basically boils down to a complete acceptance to life as it is in the moment, creating a space for the presence of Love. It’s more than just an intellectual acceptance, but a true acceptance that permeates your entire being.
Surrender is total internal non-resistance. It is letting go of ALL beliefs and judgments. In its place is an emptiness wherein resides the mystery, the unknown. Silence. It is the fullest emptiness you’ll ever find. It is where you find God.
Surrender does NOT imply doing nothing like a passive bump on a log. Imagine yourself being connected to chains pulling you in many different directions simultaneously. The chains represent your subconscious beliefs, your thoughts, your habits, your desires, and your attachments and aversions. Through non-resistance and allowing, the chains fall away on their own. By resisting the chains, you hold them in place. With the surrender of all chains, there is the freedom to move in any direction, or to sit perfectly still. All possibilities open up. What results is freedom. The ability to do anything.
What is the deepest result of complete and total surrender?
Enlightenment. Awakening. Remembering who you truly are. Self-realization. Peace. Love. Serenity. Ecstacy. Joy.
Here’s another excellent comment that Anthony brought up in the comments section which needs more attention. You bring up some excellent ideas!
i see myself as both spiritual and human. In the human realm, there are ways to work with the mind that are advantageous. I would rather make my mind a better servant that be slave to it’s noise, and if i find a way to do this, then great.
This is the issue i have with a lot of my spiritual friends.. they use their spirituality as a excuse to be passive, and life, as it does, goes about it’s business, and they are left wondering why things didn’t work out for them.
We are both spiritual, and human. I think the key, as in the ‘what if god is one of us’ song, is to embrace our spirituality through our humanity, and vice versa
You’re right. A lot of people fall into the trap of thinking that the fact that they’re not the controller means that they are essentially a bump on a log. This is NOT what it means.
Despite the fact that our true nature is the non-judgmental witness, the awareness, the observer, there’s still the human experience happening which shouldn’t be neglected.
To surf the wave of life does not mean that you bob helplessly in the sea. You do still have to catch the wave in the first place and align yourself with the wave. It’s not going to do all the work for you.
Giving up the idea of trying to control and manipulate life simply means that you aren’t resisting life as it is. You are fully engaged in life, literally one with it. You are the very flow of life itself. You just aren’t the controlling force of it. The “force” is working through you.
From an awakened perspective, the words of the great saints and avatars make a lot more sense. For example, St. Francis of Assisi asked God to make him an instrument of His peace. Jesus said that it wasn’t him doing the actions, but that it was the Father within him doing the work. Though the personal “me” isn’t doing the work, work IS still being done. In fact, it is far more powerful in this way, because the “individual” is tapping into a much higher power. Universal power instead of personal power. Read More …
This past weekend I drove up to North Carolina for a marching band shoot. (I currently live in Georgia and do a lot of photography events.) While driving in the car, I listened to the Sedona Method audio course. It really helps me become conscious of and subsequently let go of various egoic patterns. One of the things I love best about the Sedona Method is that it’s basically a program to systematically dissolve the human ego.
What AM I??
For the past few weeks, there’s been a lot of frustration present regarding my own nonexistence. See, it’s starting to sink in on a fundamental level that “I” really don’t exist, beyond just some hollow wise-sounding words, and there’s a certain amount of fear in this realization. There is a frustration in that there is not even a “me” to experience this frustration! It’s a very strange experience…
Now as this sinks in, all sense of location is also dissolving. Not only can I not find a “me” outside of thought, but I also can’t find a place where I, whatever I am, exist.
Sure, if you asked me, it could be recognized where this body that I have is, but that feels completely and totally irrelevant. It’s like if you asked where I am and I told you where my car was. That doesn’t have anything to do with me.
So not only can I not find a me and I don’t know who I am, I also can’t even find out where I am! Talk about frustrating!!
It’s truly shattering my entire sense of reality. Utterly. It’s a frustrating experience to the ego… and the ego I have is putting up a lot of resistance to this experience. All that can be done is to surrender, to let go of resisting. Read More …
In the Law of Attraction, they talk about how you need to choose what you want without actually needing it to happen. Set an intention, but have no expectations.
It sounds a bit paradoxical, so let’s explain.
Intention is a clear FOCUS on the desire, feeling it, living it, breathing it, tasting it, experiencing it in the moment, Now.
Intention is about CLARITY, not the desire to control, manipulate, force, push, or pull. It’s about the vision, plain and simple.
When you need something to happen, it may seem as though you’re focusing on what you want, but if you look closely at how you’re feeling, you’ll notice there’s an underlying feeling of lack that the need is trying to fulfill. THAT is what the Universe will respond to: the core feeling.
What’s necessary is to develop the Trust that the Universe knows HOW to best structure a harmonious and joyous life.
Here is a powerful intention:
I am the manifestation of the best for all concerned.
The secret to manifestation is not so much that you need a particular thing to happen, but that you are willing to allow whatever needs to happen to happen without having to think about it or order it, knowing that you have already determined that whatever ultimately happens will be the best for all concerned.
This state of allowing operates at a higher level than trying to micromanage your entire life.
There is a complete and total allowance for the universe to manifest as it sees fit, without trying to control or resist the experience in any way.
Whatever the universe reflects back to you will be represetative of your highest vibration of joy because that’s who you are.
I was just wondering about this. I was fine with my understanding of non-attachment until this particular idea came and I’ve now confused myself…
I assume that the whole idea of incarnating is to grow and evolve and express your true essence.
And if we are not challenged, we have no impetus to grow.
So if we are truly operating from the Higher Self, making the perfect choices, and being detached from the outcomes, how does growth happen???
Maybe from a non-dual perspective it probably doesn’t matter, but it’s not clear why…
Your ideas on this would be appreciated.
Blessings
B.
My Response:
Great question. So if our intuition is constantly guiding us, how does growth happen?
Effortlessly. At its own perfect pace.
You see, there comes to point whereby people find that using their own free will will never actually bring them happiness and lasting fulfillment, no matter how hard they try.
With the surrender of the personal will, the body moving, consciousness evolving, choices being made… all of that stuff happens seemingly on its own. In fact, it is only by truly letting go of the illusion of free will that you can be guided by spiritual (God’s) will.
A river has no trouble deciding if it should flow to the left or to the right of a boulder. It flows effortlessly, without thought.
We all have an inner voice, a silent still voice, that always knows what’s best to do. When we come totally from that voice without needing the mind’s second opinion, life seems to operate from a state of flow at its own perfect time. You “just know” the right choices to make.
The voice is NOT separate from you. That voice literally IS another aspect of you, just like the mind or the body. The voice IS you. It’s not some God “out there” somewhere.
Awakening into this experience and letting go of the illusion of free will does not mean that you become a bump on a log, a useless sack of meat and bones.
There is no spectrum, no scale, only the appearance of such.
There is ONLY the One.
The idea of variation is a result of looking at different expressions of the One, but all expressions of the One are illusion and thus not real, despite the fact that they are the One.
Nevertheless, he did people a huge favor by breaking down the unbreakable.
There is only Consciousness, the very source of Consciousness. There is no 200, 500, 600, 1000. There is only 1. Read More …
You Are Truly Loved features content designed to guide people towards enlightenment, unconditional love, and living a life of joy through Self-realization and proper application of the Law of Attraction.
It becomes a recognition that that’s simply not where you live anymore. You live in this new house now, not that old house. It doesn’t mean that your old house is a bad house. It served you well. It brought you to the place where you can now choose this house. So bless it, love it, keep it, own it, but leave it in its place. It’s a place you no longer live, but someone else may still be using that neighborhood and bless them for experiencing those things you have experienced, knowing that they are also going up the ladder in their own way, in their own time. Make it all equal and you will have equal ability to choose anything you wish. Anything at all.
This world is one of paradox. It is a world in which two dualistic and seemingly opposing viewpoints often battle it out for the title of being RIGHT. (Insert heroic trumpet fanfare here!)
Surrender. It is easily one of the most important aspects of spirituality. It is synonymous with letting go and allowing. The hallmark of surrender is the giving up of resistance. It’s a being transparent to energy that is passing through you.
For the past few weeks, there’s been a lot of frustration present regarding my own nonexistence. See, it’s starting to sink in on a fundamental level that “I” really don’t exist, beyond just some hollow wise-sounding words, and there’s a certain amount of fear in this realization. There is a frustration in that there is not even a “me” to experience this frustration! 
It’s a very strange experience…
Talk about frustrating!!
In the Law of Attraction, they talk about how you need to choose what you want without actually needing it to happen. Set an intention, but have no expectations.
