Starting to Actually Care About Others

Category Love

Lately I’ve been using this blog for just some personal space to get things out and I’m going to do so a little more now.

I’ve been describing some internal shifts that have been occurring, mainly from a spiritual awakening context, yet there are some other interpersonal things shifting as well.

Caring about others

I’m actually starting to care about other people and become interested in them, genuinely. Growing up, we moved around a lot so I had the opportunity to make friends in school, then I left. Then I’d make some more and then leave again. It’s part of the b.s. “story” of my life that my mind likes to repeat, sure, but it feels like a lot of friendships were somewhat superficial in that experience, so I learned to simply do my own thing and keep moving along, without really becoming deeply invested in other people around me.

Now there’s this sort of spiritual integration that’s happening within me, where beyond the non-existence of “me” as a separate self, there’s a sort of expansion of “me” (whatever that is) to encompass all others. True non-duality.

There’s this deep caring about others that’s beginning to blossom within me. Not a caring so much as to what others think about me or about the world, not a wanting approval, but rather a deeper connection from my heart to theirs.

Namaste. The Divinity within me recognizes the Divinity within you.

It’s weird. For the first time in my life, I’m starting to actually care about others on a soul level. It’s yet another aspect of Oneness in expression.

The Age Thing

There’s this stereotype of “enlightened people” that they’re these old gurus with gray hair and long beards. Who am I to be having these awakenings? I mean, this body I have is only 24. Sure it feels like I’ve done this whole spiritual thing in previous lifetimes and so now it’s like I have a head start this time around, but still. It’s interesting when people who’ve been into spirituality for 20, 30, 40, 50 years start coming to me for advice.

I’m noticing that age doesn’t necessarily mean everything, despite the value of life experience. It’s more about the evolution of the soul.

Nevertheless, with this whole starting to care about others thing, there’s this profound sense of humility that’s beginning to arise. It’s not all about me. Really.

The people I’ve attract into my life these days are pretty spiritually aware people. When I quit focusing on my self and simply become curious in others, I’m finding this tremendous depth in others, amazing worlds I never knew existed. People are supremely fascinating.

I talked to a friend of mine last night, Roldan, and was in awe of his being. He’s roughly 10 years older than me and he’s already gone through much of what I am going through now and can show me some of the things that are yet to come.

It is truly a humbling experience.

In California last week, I met Cheri, a 24-year-old opera singer deeply committed to unconditional love. Meeting people closer to my age who are this devoted to spirituality is truly a blessing. It is an honor and I am immensely grateful. See, most people I find in various spiritual organizations are in their late 30′s (at the very youngest) and up. Typically the age range hovers around the 40′s and 50′s. There’s nothing wrong with that at all, but it’s nice to have people who are at similar stages of their lives, y’know? It’s easier to relate.

I’ve been attracting such wonderful people lately. Energy workers, Buddhist monks, people who’ve lived in Thailand with Buddhists, ministers, healers, lovers. There’s been a wonderful group of delightful people who have synchronistically been around me lately and it’s such a joyful experience.

Your “Protection” is your Jail

I met this woman last week based out of Southern California, an intuitive energy worker intimately connected to her higher self. We spoke for a little while and with just a few words, she could bring me to tears. She had told me that it’s okay to be me and I didn’t have to hold back, as well as the fact that I didn’t have to take on the burden of others, to take on their pain as my own.

That’s something I’d been completely blind to, particularly the taking on others’ pain thing. It almost seems like the distance I’d been keeping from others was a self-protection measure, a way to keep myself “safe.” Yet the interesting thing is that by walling myself off from others, I create my own jail cell within which I suffer.

Love. Love. Love others openly, freely, unconditionally. I’m just starting to taste this now, on a level so much deeper than I knew existed. It’s not about just accepting people as who they are, but I mean COMPLETE and TOTAL Acceptance. I truly see and acknowledge who you are at the depths of your being and I love you. There is only Love, Unconditional Love. All is well and you are safe.

Caring, But Not Caring

Last week we did this exercise (led by Blair Singer, a good friend of Robert Kiyosaki) where we modeled famous speakers such as MLK Jr., Gandhi, JFK, and so on. We modeled not only what they said, but how they said it, the timing they used, their emotional state, their physical mannerisms, facial expressions, the pauses between words, and so on. We realllllly got into their state and became them. I had the opportunity to do Martin Luther King Jr.’s final speech, the day before he was assassinated.

Spend an hour being him and you’ll realize something very profound: he DEEPLY cares about others, but he doesn’t care what others think about him. There’s this authentic loving core to him, immensely powerful. Merging with that energy is a wonderful gift. Thank you MLK.

I’m just rambling on a bit here, but it’s been very helpful to let this all out. Thank you for allowing me to do so. It’s been healing.

Peace.

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17 Responses to “Starting to Actually Care About Others”

Scarface said:

Thank you for the post.
At this moment I personally am “working” on becoming more in observing, accepting and in peace with (my) emotions. I’ve managed to be more in observing, accepting and not taking the mind/thoughts personal.
But now since I’m going to a more emtional challanging period, I notice that when it comes to my emotions I am not jet capable with that as I’ve been about my mind. I think it’s because I unconciously labbeled emotions as weak for nearly all my life, and it was something that represents fear, wussieness, and something that stopped me from doing what I want or be who I am. So my automatic conditioning, I noticed is still to fight and supress it.
To change this I am no trying to be more in observing, accepting, not taking it personal mode. Do you have other suggestions, excercise(s) that could enhance this? If so I would Love to hear them.

To add something about MLK, I’ve got some awesome youtube cilps in which he shares the power of Love, and it showed the Love intention behind what he wanted to achieve. And like I heard him once say somthing like: I know it will succeed, no matter what happens. Because Love never fails. Here some links.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNPryUk9H4c
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8bL1di4ow8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cDRWvDx8h4

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
Yeah, there’s so many great tools, Scarface.

Both EFT and The Sedona Method are perfect for exactly that. I picked up a Byron Katie book yesterday and started reading about her process she calls “The Work” and it also covers just what you’re looking for in a practical and effective way.

and thank you for the gift of those videos.

Scarface Reply:
November 11th, 2008 at 7:40 am
Thank you for the suggestions.
To give an update of how it went with “dealing” with my emotions the last couples of days, and with my new attitude towards it.
The last period I’ve managed to just pay attention to my thoughts and as a result of that my mind had become much more quite. Now with this new way, I also just recent started to life more in this attention (observing what happens) mode. Which caused when I came in contact with others or happenings, I was much more sensitive (emotional receptive) to their conciousness. Basically almost feeling emotionally the same like they are feeling. And in many cases, it was not a kind of emotion/conciousness that was “strong”.
Now as I told earlier, I now see I’ve never “dealt” with emotions in and accepting (and effective) way. I tried fighting, suppressing and reframing the shit out of them. Basically because I didn’t want to feel them so called bad/weakening/neagtive emotions.
Now with my attitude of just paying attention (not rejecting or trying to change them) to the emotions arising. I feel them even stronger. They are gone quicker, not because I want them to be gone but it just happens. I now enjoy and accept them, as something that is a part of this manifestation.
But what the most awesome thing now is for me is that, I could never imagine that one could life which such strong and amount of emotions. I thought it would make me a stressfull nervous wreck. That was what always scared me the most when trying to become more loving, compassionate, understanding and open.
But with realizing simultaniously when I feel the emotion and suffering of someone. That it’s just an emotion that arises in my body and it is not mine, but just something to be experienced, accepted and allowed. And at the same time I feel that I trancend it also, because my true nature is beyond this all. It’s that which is God which does al this but trancends and is untouched by it at the same time.
Now I can finally understand how people like Martin Luther King, Ghandi and so on, where capable of merging/putting on their shoulders the suffering of millions of people. And yet remain loving, compassionate and well balanced people. The felt the suffering but at the same time they trancended it. Like Martin Luther King stated that he was not fighting for equality between white and black, but that it was God who did it through him. Which basically must mean he also trancended himself (and therefore his emotions) at the same time.

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 11th, 2008 at 11:08 am
YES
buddhalite said:

wow you’re only 24! that is so cool. i think it won’t be surprising these days to find more and more young people who attain enlightenment early. like mine happened not even as a result of intentional seeking but it just fell into place as a result of my life experience. mine happened at 30 (okay, so not as young as 24 but…physical age really is one of those things that’s becoming less relevant now). it felt very natural. i think we’ve done this before, now we’re here to see what else is possible. these are exciting times man!

and yes, Love is It! Love, Fearless, Unconditional Love – it is the ultimate expression of Who We Are.

on another note, will you be posting your interaction with Abraham soon? i’m looking forward to seeing that exchange!

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
It’s great to hear about your awakening, buddhalite.

It’s funny that you ask about the Abraham interaction as I was just thinking about that a few minutes ago. As soon as it comes in, I’ll type up the dialogue. There’s also a section on relationships that I’d like to review and share with everyone.
Josh said:

Being 17, I absolutely agree with this post. I had somewhat of an awakening this year. I now have an ever present peace with me at all times. If I look into this peace, I see immense love as well.
Its weird, because I see you talk about adyashanti, and I listened to him alot. And tolle. and Kenton Whitman.

Just thought I’d say thank you for what your doing, and age DEFINITELY doesn’t matter.

much love,
Josh

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Josh, that’s truly amazing. It’s good to have you here. Hats off to “you.”
Dusty said:

Thanks Ariel… I used to feel guilty about not caring about others, so I used to fake it. Now I’m at the point where I’m just about neutral in regards to others… “You do your thing, and I’ll do mine.”

I’m really looking forward to genuine care for others. …I love that dancing dude!

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
lol Dusty

That shift to neutrality is something pretty important.

Acceptance at one level is “I don’t like what you’re doing, but I’m going to accept you anyways because it’s right/spiritual/holy/correct/makes me feel better/etc.” It’s almost like trying to override negative energy with positive energy.

There seems to be a deeper level of acceptance (and this is only just starting to sink in for me on a deeper level beyond just the intellectual level) whereby you recognize that each person is truly doing the best they can given their level of consciousness, beliefs, upbringing, and situation. We all came here on earth to experience certain things and while we may not see the entire picture right now, there’s a sense of acceptance that arises when we recognize that we’re all here to do certain things and be ourselves. When realizations like this start arising, we start letting go of the negative judgments in the first place and what we find that remains with the let go of judgment is total acceptance and unconditional love.

So yeah, being totally okay with allowing others to be as they choose is a truly valuable state of being.
Dusty said:

After reading your response, I realized I care about others more than I thought I did… I’m just still letting go of fears making me more apprehensive to show it.

BTW, I checked out Cheri’s website and saw the website of the school she graduated from:

http://www.universityofsantamonica.edu/

Looks COOL! I’m all but planning already.

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 8:06 pm

If you wind up signing up for the spiritual psychology program, let me know. From what she told me about it, it sounded absolutely amazing.
Dusty said:

I’ve still got 3 more years till I get my Bachelor’s Degree, but yeah… I’ll let you know if it happens.
Kacie said:

Ariel,

It’s so funny and amazing to hear all of these words coming from you, because they could just as easily be coming from myself. I’m 25, and although I know I’ve been working on my awakening through many many lives, it is a bit strange to have woken up at 25 years old. I feel so grateful to have so much time this time around! It’s also a bit of a trip to realize how little age has to do with enlightenment.

Until this year, I had the same kind of experiences with others- I tended to keep them at a distance, and I know part of that was a defense against their energy, because I didn’t know how to shield myself against them, and avoid taking on their pain.

Through my awakening, I opened myself up to an onslaught of energy from everyone, but just before it overwhelmed me, a teacher showed up in my life and taught me how to shield myself. You also showed up in my life and taught me more about compassion. Through these gifts I’ve been able to care and love people more deeply than I ever could have imagined.

This year, I have suddenly been attracting all sorts of awakened souls- including many that I know I’ve been friends with for many lifetimes. I have suddenly become part of a family of friends, all in various stages of awakening and we recognize the beauty of finding each other again. I have never felt so loved and accepted- the feeling is transcendent. We all struggle to put words to it- but it’s like being swaddled in love. It is the most safe, secure feeling- we cannot fail and we’ll never be alone again. It’s that amazing feeling of acceptance you were talking about. We utterly, completely love and accept each other.

It’s amazing too, because each one of us recognizes what we are here for- to spread light and love- and to show others the possibility of existing in love, peace and bliss.

Ariel Bravy Reply:
November 9th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
“being swaddled in love”

You put it so well, Kacie!

It’s a joy to swaddle in the Love you’re sharing with us. Thank you for truly being yourself.
Jasper said:

Thanks for sharing!
The MLK speeches almost got me crying, I didnt realize up to now, what a great man he really was.

And for the caring thing: I also got this hunch, that selfless service to others is quite important, but I´m yet to realize that, or unconditional love, by direct experience…

I found a group of people, who emphasize selfless service, or “world Karma yoga” as they sometimes call it as a way to realization. They mainly use dynamic prayer as a tool for that.
http://www.aetherius.org is their website.

Scarface Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 5:08 am
Jasper, it’s nice to hear that it touched you. It’s just that one can feel the intention behind what he stood for. The intentions behind things is what makes something “strong” or “weak”. I bet his intentions behind it were one of Love (for all) and equality (in value). Which are both very strong forces. Do you know that for instance one act with the intention of Love by one person is just as strong as an act based on for instance hate by 750.000 peolple. And I bet MLK knew that.
Where many leaders also have intentions of personal pride and gain (ego) behind it which makes their teachings/leadership weak(er). But with MLK that was not the case I noticed, there was no (or little) personal pride and gain (ego) behind it, real authentic.
If you like to read about the power of intentions behind things I would recommend the book “power vs. Force” by Dr. Hawkins.

The “power” of that group I think is determened by the inetntions behind it (and of the people in the group). I have noticed within these groups to often, that the peolple within it had also intentions of pride (“I’m good and better then others because I am not selfish”), etc.. I’m not saying that it’s the case with this group beacuse I don’t knowanything about it. But I think it’s something to look out for.
Cheers, Scarface