Does Surrendering Control Mean I Don’t Do Anything?

Category Enlightenment, Surrender

Here’s another excellent comment that Anthony brought up in the comments section which needs more attention. You bring up some excellent ideas!

i see myself as both spiritual and human. In the human realm, there are ways to work with the mind that are advantageous. I would rather make my mind a better servant that be slave to it’s noise, and if i find a way to do this, then great.

This is the issue i have with a lot of my spiritual friends.. they use their spirituality as a excuse to be passive, and life, as it does, goes about it’s business, and they are left wondering why things didn’t work out for them.

We are both spiritual, and human. I think the key, as in the ‘what if god is one of us’ song, is to embrace our spirituality through our humanity, and vice versa

You’re right. A lot of people fall into the trap of thinking that the fact that they’re not the controller means that they are essentially a bump on a log. This is NOT what it means.

Despite the fact that our true nature is the non-judgmental witness, the awareness, the observer, there’s still the human experience happening which shouldn’t be neglected.

To surf the wave of life does not mean that you bob helplessly in the sea. You do still have to catch the wave in the first place and align yourself with the wave. It’s not going to do all the work for you.

photo by envisionpublicidad

(The surfing analogy I picked up from one of Tom Stine’s recent posts on no control.)

Giving up the idea of trying to control and manipulate life simply means that you aren’t resisting life as it is. You are fully engaged in life, literally one with it. You are the very flow of life itself. You just aren’t the controlling force of it. The “force” is working through you.

From an awakened perspective, the words of the great saints and avatars make a lot more sense. For example, St. Francis of Assisi asked God to make him an instrument of His peace. Jesus said that it wasn’t him doing the actions, but that it was the Father within him doing the work. Though the personal “me” isn’t doing the work, work IS still being done. In fact, it is far more powerful in this way, because the “individual” is tapping into a much higher power. Universal power instead of personal power.

There is this idea that if I’m not in charge, then I don’t have to take responsibility for my actions, I don’t have to make decisions, and so on. This is a wonderful escape for the ego because it means that anything it comes up with is now okay. However, there are still consequences to every action and what you sew, you will ultimately reap.

This is similar to the idea that “life is perfect” so I don’t need to bother doing anything in life, including growing or expanding. This is a subtle misunderstanding of what it means for life to be perfect as it is. A lot of people get stuck here and it can be hard to help them move beyond this because they literally have no desire to change. After all, things are perfect the way they are!

I agree with you, Anthony, that people can surrender control and think that they now have no say in what happens. Then they wonder why life doesn’t work out for them. It’s just a misunderstanding of spiritual principles.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being in control or taking charge of your life and changing things when appropriate. When we get stuck in wanting to change or the wanting to control (because we feel like we can’t change or aren’t in control in the first place), what we don’t like persists and we then feel even more out of control. So really all I’m advocating is to let go of constantly wanting to control life and instead flowing with life, without resistance.

My suggestion is not to believe this reasoning one way or another. That’s not the point. Instead I would recommend that people ask, “Who is the one who wants to control life?” and see if you can find the “me” who is in control. If that “me” is actually a real being (and it certainly feels like it’s real), then there should be no trouble in finding a “me” who is the controller of your life. It’s something you must go within and do the work to discover for yourself. You can’t just take my word for it, and in this way, I’m glad you’re not.

Thanks for your question.

Continued Discussion | 2 Forum Comments

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4 Responses to “Does Surrendering Control Mean I Don’t Do Anything?”

Anthony said:

I’m really glad we’re getting clarity on this. For the record i don’t disagree with anything you say or have said… It’s more about getting clear on how looking at things from different perspectives brings up more truth.

Oh, and i enjoy stirring the pot!

I think you really nailed it when you said:

“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being in control or taking charge of your life and changing things when appropriate. When we get stuck in wanting to change or the wanting to control (because we feel like we can’t change or aren’t in control in the first place), what we don’t like persists and we then feel even more out of control. So really all I’m advocating is to let go of constantly wanting to control life and instead flowing with life, without resistance.”

So… taking the surfing analogy to the next level..

It’s like we’re sitting out he back, waiting for the waves.

We can choose to struggle and get upset when the waves are small, we can pretend they’re bigger then they are and try to catch them… and not get anywhere…

We can see the big waves we know we’re not skilled enough to handle and try to catch them.. and wipe out.

Or…

We can wait, enjoying the peacefulness of the water and watching the land … the coolness of the liquid beneath us… the deep blue depths… watching the horizon.. for the right time, and the right wave.. and when it comes…

Awesome

A.

Anthonys last blog post..Song – “Sapphire”
Ariel Bravy said:

Yeah, great extension of the analogy.

The quote you quoted came right out of the Sedona Method audio course, from the section on control. Thanks, Hale!

The interesting thing is, in my experience, that we get to the state of having the “controller” flow through us by letting go of trying to be the controller ourselves.

In all honesty, we have NO IDEA what’s going to happen tomorrow. We can try to manifest things and whatnot, but ultimately it’s out of our control and we can’t guarantee anything one way or another. For all you know, a nuke could have gone off 20 miles away and you’re just seconds from obliteration. There’s no guarantee that you will even be alive tomorrow.

There’s a deep lack of knowingness that the ego desperately tries to resist, and it will resist with all its might. It will think of what it can do and how it can fix things. The mind will spin and toil to figure out the future.

What’s so cool, and this is a lesson I’m learning over and over and over again… I’m talking about it so much because I’m actively learning it… is that when we let go of trying to control the uncontrollable, we are literally cradled in the infinite unconditional love and safety of life itself. It’s not a describable feeling and I can’t really explain it, but when we let go of insecurity itself, we discover the ultimate security within.

Instead of us trying to control life, the flow of life flows through us, becomes us. Synchronicity abounds and everything fits in its perfect place, even if we’re not always conscious in the moment of why things happen the way they do.

and don’t worry Anthony, the energy behind your posts is very clear. I can tell you’re not in a destructive, argumentative mode. You seem to really looking to dive deep into this stuff, and I respect that. No worries, mate!

Anthony Reply:
October 5th, 2008 at 3:28 am
These spam protection things are making my head hurt…

Alas…

YES

I have models of these dynamics of which you speak in my mind *actually i think they’re from the universal mind*

Control is an ugly word. I like to think of it as a negotiator. like an interface. or control module.

yes, i know what you mean about surrendering and letting go. Perhaps thats where my spiritual friends go wrong.. they confuse it with doing nothing.

Tis the flow that works… one thing i’m finding difficult at the moment is letting go… so much in my life is seemingly going wrong… and the more i try to fix it the worse it gets…

However, i’ve come to this realisation, right now, as i sit in my house, that it’s time to rest. When the time comes to fix these things, then it shall be. But for now, my instincts and ‘universal intelligence’ say… not now. Wait. Relax. Let us bring you a wave thats just right for you.

Thanks for your posts Ariel, it’s good to read your stuff (since i am longer am on IG)

A.

Anthonys last blog post..Overwhelmed…
Myrko | AwakeBlogger said:

Ariel, thanks. This is THE topic you can go wrong if you get in touch with spirituality. It’s great that you brought it up.

I think it is good to embrace the human side AND the spiritual side. Genpo Roshi talkes about a triangle for both sides: http://www.awakeblogger.com/20.....vs-spirit/ and I am working to balance them for me. It is currently my greatest challange.

At the moment I see it this way: You are a part of the whole and the important thing is to be aligned with it (to surf the wave). This is when “success” happens. It also includes no resistance. I can virtually feel this non-resistance. If I hava a new idea I don’t only look at it from a small perspective, I also try to feel if it generates any resistance to the whole or if it is aligned with what is.

We have a choice to make, and ultimately only choices that are aligned with truth will work out, will be successful in the long run. There may be a short-term success, but life has a way to correct itself. So every choice we make that is not aligned with truth will get corrected on the long run.

Those choises that are aligned and not resisted well flow with the wave.

Myrko | AwakeBloggers last blog post..How I Suffered From Clinical Depression and Came Back From It

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