Ariel’s New Direction for 2009

My life is changing direction now at the start of this new year, and thus this site will change as well. Whether this change applies for all of 2009 is really of no concern, but it makes for a catchy post title.

Wanting To Help Lots of People

I want to be of service to the highest good in the best way possible. I’ve had this idea for a while now that the best way I could serve the world was to share spiritual truth with as many people as possible, giving out as much information as possible. So, as you’ve probably noticed, I’ve spent time pounding out an insane amount of content on this blog.

Behind the scenes what you guys don’t know is that I have literally HUNDREDS of pages of content I’ve already written over the past few years, page after page after page of ideas and topics for posts and books, hours of spoken word recorded on my pocket voice recorder, lots of posts that I can easily queue up to get posted on this blog… there’s just so much stuff that pours through me and every post that I write triggers two or three more post ideas that the fun never ends. I mean there’s so much content that flows through me that it’s almost absurd.

For a while the best way I could share what I have to offer was through writing and so that is what I did. I’m now finding it more natural desirable to speak and say what needs to be said in the moment, as uncensored as that is. It’s more fresh and dynamic, more lively.

Again, for a while I really wanted to grow this blog to directly help as many people as possible. My formula for success came from what I’ve heard from the business world: If you want to make the most of amount of money possible and be as successful as possible, you have to help the most amount of people possible. Yet looking at this topic tonight, an idea came to me:

Life’s Little Moments

What if the way that I could ultimately do the MOST amount of good is by saying one little thing to someone which snowballs into one of the most profound things I could possibly do with my life?

Simple little example: I have no idea if this story is historically accurate at all, if I’m messing up any details in retelling it or whatever, but let’s go with it because it helps get my point across.

In school, Hitler took a class led by a Jewish art teacher. One day he was painting and his teacher insulted his painting or somehow said that he/she didn’t like it. Because of this, Hitler decided that he didn’t like Jews and we all know what happened from there later on down the line.

What if someone had made one little comment to the teacher that morning to put him/her in a good mood? What if someone had said something kind about Jews that day, altering Hitler’s perception of Jews forever more?

Could that person have done more good through a moment’s fleeting comment versus an entire lifetime’s worth of trying to do good in the world? You see my point?

Even those who work in more subtle ways behind the scenes are playing very important and necessary roles as well. We will probably never know the degree to which we impact the world.

Not Needing to be Famous

I’m feeling guided to not try and be the next Eckhart Tolle and get my material, as great as I feel it is, spread all around the world like the next Bible or something.

I get that’s how things may play out for some people and it’s appropriate for them at that time. For others, it may be different.

For me it’s becoming less and less about size and ability to influence the masses. Rather, it’s simply about going through life and allowing whatever arises to arise, whatever needs to be said to be said, and to live life as Love itself, rather than needing to play any particular role such as successful enlightened spiritual teacher. There seems to be less ego in this new manner of operating.

It’s still about living in service to God, but not necessarily about needing to directly impact as many people as possible. The two need not necessarily be linked, though they most certainly can be.

Where Am I Going?

I also feel like I’m losing a single sense of direction, which is a pretty scary feeling. Let me put it like this: It feels like the most authentic expression of my true nature is Love. Love has no direction. Like the light of the sun, it simply shines out in all directions equally, radiating itself, being itself, yet going nowhere in particular.

It feels like my life is about letting go of this concept called Ariel and truly being a vessel for God, an expression of God. No thing in particular.

There is the fear that if I’m not going in a certain direction, I may not end up where I need to go, wherever the heck that is.

Yet what I’m finding is that it’s not about trying to get anywhere particular in the first place, including this nebulous thing called success and happiness, but rather living in the moment and being who I truly am, right here, right now. The universe is continuously supporting me, even if my fears tell me otherwise. Going within I can reconnect to this feeling of security of being supported by God, a feeling that doesn’t come from anything outside myself such as money, people, situations, jobs, or anything else. Security only comes from within. True security anyways.

Being myself is requiring a tremendous amount of let go, of letting go of needing to get anywhere, or of even knowing where I’m going, and allowing the universe to synchronistically set up each experience for me in the way it knows best.

I’ll be perfectly honest. Fear of the unknown has been one of my biggest fears in this lifetime and this is requiring me to dive fully into the unknown, to embrace it and call it my own.

Living In The Moment

Life is becoming more pure, more raw, more in the moment. When I write, there’s always the ability to reword how I phrased something, or to even delete a post if I don’t want to say something. When I speak, however, I lose that ability because what was said has been said. It’s now out there and there’s no turning back. There’s less of a safety net with speaking as compared to writing and so it requires trusting the flow of energy as it comes through me in the form of words, without allowing my mind to filter it in any way. It’s a deeper level of trust.

So coming back to where this blog is headed, I don’t think I’ll be directing my intensity for spiritual truth here necessarily, at least not to the same degree. Some energy may be devoted to books. Some energy may be more in “real life” altogether and less towards this online thing. Some of it may go to dropping the idea of teaching altogether and just spending more me-time without trying to help anyone at all, anyone except myself. I honestly don’t know yet, but I’m open to being guided to wherever I am needed, wherever is most appropriate for me to be at any moment, without becoming fixed in any one mode of operating.

Thank you all for enjoying this ride with me thus far here on this blog ‘o awesomeness.

The fun will continue. I’m using this post as a sort of permission slip to allow myself to expand into other areas beyond just this blog, while still including this blog.

With this there will be some changes happening here, the extent of which I am not yet fully aware of.

Letting go into the unknown,

Ariel